kids question

[Morbid Angel]

Hey everyone,

So I recently became a dad and as a new parent Im curious as to some how some of you who are parents managed some of the things along the way.
Right now I am faced with a problem. My wife insists that we need to find a daycare for my son. He is only 6 month. I am curious to know what is a right age to let your child in to a daycare? Any tips or advice in that area would be great.

Thanks guys.

[Sawyer]

It will always be hard no matter what age your kid is to put them in care. Most places have limits on the youngest age they will accept. Finding a place you trust, can afford and you like the people there is almost more important than 6 month or 8 month. One of the biggest problems we have had is finding a place that will work with your work sched - we have had our kids in places that closed at 5:30 and we were rushing every single day to make it.

[flino2004]

my daugther is 27 months old, my wife and I decided that one of us has to take care of the her, she is stay home mom and four months ago I started working from home then I can expend time with her as well and I think that I did the correct move

[natty]

I think the bottom line is money, can you afford for your wife to stay home and look after the nipper? Perhaps she wants her independance back? Its a tough one, my wife gave up her career which she now regrets, but on the other hand she wouldnt change a thing....

Tough one. .

[thablanch]

Dunno in B.C, but here (QC) the provincial parental plan provides revenue for 50 weeks, there is variations and options...
So it is more or less one year for us. We should have the 3rd kid any day now, and my wife will stay home for about a year.

Sawyer, our strategy is the splitted schedule, She leaves home a little later in the morning, and I finish work really early to get the kids in the afternoon. So kids do spend as less time as possible away from us.. I have the chance to work for a place where the scheduling is ( a little) more flexible than most other places I worked before.

[glyph]

my wife stayed at home for six /seven years and it did make her very stressed,
now she is working again she is much happier - but we both think it was very much the right thing to do - half a day away from home for little children no problem, (probably good for them in fact - play,interaction etc) - the whole day away -- its too much

as I'm self employed there've been long periods when I work from home which helped.. now my kids are older (8 and 11) it's school holiday time that needs to be dealt with - but as Natty said its a difficult one

[tricky]

There is no right answer to this - everyone has different needs/budgets etc. My wife gave up her job with a view to going back after 6 months, but changed her mind 5 months in and has stayed at home ever since (my daughter is now nearly three).

Good friends of ours have all done it differently. One set of friends has had their daughter in day care from 6 months for three days a week, and grandparents the other two (they are very luck in the grandparents respect having them in the same village!).

The other thing to consider is that usually, people will think that their way is/was the best way. Don't hang yourself up about it: whatever you do will be just fine!

[sea2stars]

Here the earliest age allowed in daycare is 6 weeks. My wife took 2 months off after the kidectomy and we have a family friend, who's been doing the daycare thing for 20+ years, who takes our 9mo daughter twice a week. Luckily my wife is a Per Diem nurse and can set up her odd schedule in advance and one grandmother is 10 minutes down the road; good for sanity breaks during the week.

I guess it comes down to what you can afford, what you feel comfortable with and where you live. The USA is 2nd to last in parent/child benefits and I know business would love to kill what there is.

[Da_elf]

im supprised to see no raytracing, AA, sample rate jokes thrown in hehe

[EricKlein]

The "my wife insists" part might give you a clue as to which direction to go

My daughter is 6 now, and for us it worked out where my wife stopped working and watched her most of the time. That being said, we found daycare close to home that would do one or two days a week so my wife could have a break and get things done~

I have friends however that both have active careers, and they've had their kids in daycare from around 6 months old with no problems. I think sometimes that kids benifit from the experience to be around so many other beasties like themselves-

e.

[Sawyer]

I am assuming you guys have done all the math to make sure your decisions are the right ones and only you can really figure that out. It was really hard for us to put our girls in care but its been something they love.


I closed down my business last year and I haven't been able to keep the time with the kids I used to have. But with the new job I have had so less stress...

Anyway there are tough questions that kids pose and this is one of them, it wont be something that scars them for life though. And do the research find a place you 2 are comfortable with. That's the biggest thing. You want the transition to be easiest for you guys too.

[percydaman]

If you do end up having the wife stay home full time with the little one, make sure they get out alot and expose your child to other children. My wife has stayed home with my son since birth, and I swear he's too sheltered.

[Morbid Angel]

If you do end up having the wife stay home full time with the little one, make sure they get out alot and expose your child to other children. My wife has stayed home with my son since birth, and I swear he's too sheltered.

well I am in a situation right now where I feel that my wife is exhausted and overwhelmed by the difficulty of raising a child. She is seeking a time off, while I am working full time. What I am trying to figure out is the best age and so far I have narrowed it down to 2-3 years. Most daycares have to have kids be able to eat on their own, dress etc. I cant see a daycare taking on 3-6 month old and have him in a group of 5-10 kids. There is just no way 1-2 people could handle that many infants.

[percydaman]

there are daycare's out there that will take infants, but they are a lot fewer. My son is nearly 2 and a half now, but still can't feed himself, and is behind on most milestones. It's tough on my wife cause she has a degree in early childhood development. So you can imagine the pressure she puts on herself. Some kids just take longer.

[zoranm]

Dmitry,

I'd suggest you talk it over with your pediatrician who is following your child as well. Kids are constantly going through diferent stages and you'd need someone to tell you what to expect in the next stage of development. For example: 6 months is good time to take them to child care from the technical point of view (because they are not so much tied up to the perents yet) but they develop very strong attachemnt between 8-9 months and is very distressing for them to be left alone with unknown people at that particular time.
From my experience: we gave my son to the childcare at 12 months for one day a week and than increase that one day more every year. It was decision based not only on money but on the child wellbing as well as on my wife sanity. I'd definatelly suggest to spend at least some time with the other kids to learn to socialise and to exchange some viruses with the other kiddies (very important for his imune sistem) Related to this point: be prepared to spend some serious sickie-days for the first three months of his daycare. Good luck to you and your wife.
zoran